Family fragmentation: what it means and how to deal with it

Even the most seemingly idyllic families face problems, and it is sometimes difficult to determine how to solve these problems. In the most extreme cases, specific problems can even lead to alienation.

Often referred to as a broken family, there are many potential reasons for the alienation between family members, many of which boil down to the specific details surrounding the individual and the circumstances involved.

To learn more about the causes of these relationship rifts and how to resolve them, VigorTip Mind hired Frank Anderson, MD, a psychiatrist and psychotherapist who specializes in trauma therapy.

This article covers the causes of alienation, how to know whether a family relationship is worth saving, and how to accept a broken relationship.

What causes the alienation between family members?

Anderson explained: “Broken families refer to unhealthy or severed families within the family unit.” “They are usually related to divorce, but they will definitely occur in a complete family, where various members conflict or alienate each other.”

Although each relationship is unique, Anderson explained some common causes of alienation between family members:

  • Abuse: Anderson noted that this may include sexual, physical, or emotional abuse. Although abuse is usually the result of certain other factors (such as mental health issues), it is understandable if it complicates your capacity for forgiveness.
  • Mental health issues: If you or your family are facing mental health issues that lead to alienation, it is important to address these issues before attempting to repair the relationship. If you are struggling with these issues, make sure you ask the therapist for help, then communicate with your family that you have asked for help and move on. If family members are dealing with mental health problems, you can ask if they have solved the problem by seeking help.
  • Financial difficulties: Money can complicate any relationship, but this is especially true for loved ones. In other words, many times, these problems can be resolved by speaking out your concerns openly and honestly.
  • Different beliefs: This can work in various ways—for example, politics or religion—if it affects your ability or your family’s ability to be friendly and respectful, it can become a major issue.
  • Cross-border: This may be especially true for immediate family members such as parents or siblings. In these situations, it is especially important to make sure that you have made the other person aware of your boundaries so that they know what offended you. If your family is trying to explain their boundaries to you, it is also important to listen to their opinions.
  • Excessive control over the image of parents or parents: Although the image of parents or parents is usually well-intentioned, sometimes they may overdo it when exerting control. If this is continuing into your personal life and affecting your relationships, it is important to make your parents aware of the way they are affecting your life.
  • Refusal to apologize: If you or your loved one refuses to apologize, it’s important to make sure you understand the other’s motives. If you feel that you have considered everyone’s reasoning, but still refuse to apologize, this may lead to major disagreements.

How do you know when the family relationship is worth saving?

First of all, it is important to be honest about the nature of your relationship with this family member before things go bad. Is it meaningful and positive, or is the history of this relationship full of toxicity? If you do find it to be meaningful and positive, it may be worth fixing.

Anderson said: “When the parties involved are willing to get together, listen to each other’s views and can freely discuss their differences to resolve conflicts and repair relationships, broken families can be repaired.”

How to effectively repair the relationship with family members

In order to effectively repair the relationship, Anderson emphasized the importance of both parties’ willingness to “give up a defensive posture.”

What he meant was that each party should be willing to listen to the other’s opinions, even if it means hearing things that may be harmful. It also requires both parties to talk about their feelings honestly and openly.

Anderson said: “If it becomes unsafe for anyone involved at any time, each party should have the freedom to end the discussion, perhaps postpone the discussion, or not follow up if necessary.”

If you want to talk to your family but are worried that things will become too intense for anyone, it may be helpful to seek the help of a mediator.

“It is often helpful to have a third party present to arbitrate the discussion,” Anderson said. “The neutral party should be able to feel able to speak when necessary and establish boundaries and guidelines for subsequent discussions.”

How to accept the end of a family relationship

It is important to note that you can forgive someone without regaining your relationship with that person. In fact, it is better for your mental health if you really forgive them, because it can help you find peace.

“Forgiveness is something that has been achieved Internal,” Anderson said. “It doesn’t necessarily require the presence of another person to be meaningful, successful, and lasting.”

At the end of any important relationship, Anderson emphasized the importance of treatment. Although this may take some time, if you are willing to forgive someone spiritually, you can pass in a way that gives you peace of mind.

Anderson said: “In the context of supportive treatment, it is certainly possible to resolve, resolve, release and forgive the harm to your family, even if you are not in contact with them.”

Very good sentence

Whether you need to forgive your family for yourself or repair your relationship, it is best to make sure that what you do is good for your mental health. It is possible to get rid of the harmful things in the past, and you will only feel better about it.