If you and your spouse are couples of different faiths, you may make some serious mistakes that could damage your marriage. These mistakes will prepare you for the worsening pain, nagging tensions, and constant arguing about your religious differences in marriages of different faiths. We have compiled a list of mistakes in marriages of different faiths.
Mistakes in marriages of different faiths
When it comes to marriages of different faiths, you need to consider the challenges ahead. Here is an overview of some of the most common mistakes people make in marriages of different faiths.
- Ignore your religious differences.
- Adopt an attitude of “love conquers everything” and ignore the problem, believing that it will disappear.
- Belief in religion is not important in the long run.
- Think of humor as all you need to survive the religious differences in marriages of different faiths.
- Do not consider decisions that cannot be compromised, such as circumcision, baptism, briss, tithing, etc.
- Believe that in your interfaith marriage, differences are always irreconcilable.
- Failing to realize the importance of understanding, respecting, accepting and handling your religious differences in interfaith marriages.
- Decided to cut off contact with the extended family, unless there is parental abuse.
- Assume that you understand all of each other’s belief issues.
- I believe that your love for each other will overcome all the marriage problems of different beliefs.
- Thinking that conversion is the answer will make things easier.
- Eliminate your family’s worries about your interfaith marriage.
- Believe that your marriage will not face any obstacles.
- Before your interfaith marriage, there was no discussion about your child’s religious upbringing concerns.
- Refuse to discover common characteristics that your religion may have.
- Failure to check your background and how they shape your attitudes and beliefs.
- Impose your beliefs on your partner.
- Failure to plan holidays and other special life cycle events in advance.
- Turn the vacation into a competition between your beliefs.
- Lack of understanding of one’s own beliefs.
- Continue to press the hotkey on the difference in beliefs.
- Let family and friends intervene in your interfaith marriage.
- Lack of respect for each other’s heritage.
- Forget to ask questions and be curious about your partner’s tradition, culture, or religion.
- Failure to notify your family and friends of your vacation decision in time.
- Force your children to feel that they must choose between the religious beliefs of their father or mother.
- Let your children have negative emotions, attitudes, or comments about your partner’s religion.
- Privatize your religious beliefs instead of claiming or talking about your beliefs with your spouse.
- Give so much that you lose your own traditions and eventually your own self-esteem.
Unity and respect
According to Luchina Fisher’s 2010 article “Clinton’s Interreligious Marriage Challenges in Chelsea: Children, Holidays, and Soul Exploration”, Susanna Macomb said that one of the biggest mistakes made by couples of different religions is not showing their family a united front.
It is important for a couple to make a decision together and then show it to the family together.
“It’s easy to blame the newcomers in the family,” Macomb said. “It’s up to you to protect your spouse from your parents. Make no mistake, you are choosing your partner on your wedding day. Your marriage must now come first.”
Getting married outside of your own beliefs requires the two of you to be particularly mature, respectful and compromised in order to establish a successful long-term relationship. It takes a lot of effort to prevent external influences from causing irreparable harm to both of you (such as in-laws or grandparents) and the differences in your internal religious background.
Spend some time with your partner (or a neutral outside professional) to discuss these issues before you get married. If it is too late and you find that you have encountered some difficulties in this field, please seek professional help as soon as possible.