The value of constructive anger

The term “constructive anger” sounds like a contradiction, but in fact, learning to use negative emotions in a positive way can go a long way toward healing, progress, and recovery.

For example, for people with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), this is a series of often debilitating symptoms caused by terrible situations or experiences. Destructive anger is a common emotion that can lead to They abuse others or engage in drug abuse or self-harm.

In fact, anger is an effective emotion, not always negative and harmful. It may have good or bad results, depending on how you deal with it. This is why learning to use anger constructively can be a useful life skill and how to do it.

The importance of constructive anger

Anger is usually an emotion, and it motivates you to let others know what you need in a particular situation. Generally speaking, it is a good thing to speak for yourself. But think about it: how likely is it that yelling, criticizing, and arguing with others will actually get you what you want?

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When you transform anger into these behaviors, others will only hear that you are angry, not the message you are trying to convey. Their natural reaction is to be angry, so no one can convey any information. To make matters worse, the same arguments can happen again and again, and the results are equally frustrating.

However, when you use your anger in a constructive way, there are many potential benefits.Express constructive anger:

  • Respect yourself and those who are in conflict with you
  • Let you be heard the way you want to be heard—as a thoughtful, fair, and interested person in another point of view, not a person who is upset, picky, and unwilling to listen to other people’s ideas or opinions, no matter what How effective they are

Over time, as you hone your skills to transform anger from a potentially destructive force into a constructive asset, you can expect a new understanding of how you and others feel. As a result, you may find that your relationships have improved and last longer.

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Time is by your side

Destructive expressions of anger almost always erupt spontaneously. You lash out at others or yourself at this moment. Suppose you give the impression that a colleague at work has been criticizing you unfairly. Before you send a sternly worded email or rush into a colleague’s office, prepare five. Think twice before you act: Remind yourself that expressing anger in a confrontational way is a destructive use of anger and is unlikely to get the results you want—for example, an explanation (which may have a reasonable explanation) or an apology (you may deserve it) of).

Or suppose a friend cancelled an important lunch date with you at the last minute, and not for particularly good reasons. Your first reaction is anger: you have blocked the time, you are ready, and you look forward to catching up to enjoy a meal.

When your friends abandon your plan, instead of causing them difficulties, give yourself time to think about how to best respond. This will allow you to express your anger and disappointment in a way that might help heal your feelings of injury and repair any improvisations that your friend’s actions have caused to your relationship.

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For example, one option is to make a new plan with your friends so that you can meet again soon. At that meeting, you can calmly and without criticism explain why the last-minute cancellation made you upset and why. Your friends should be able to hear you clearly without being ashamed or judged. In this way, you will express your anger, but not in a way that may cause more problems, and because you use constructive anger carefully, you two will be able to recover you with a better understanding of each other Relationship.